
Besides being a well-known critic, I'm pretty sure this guy is required by law to inform you when he moves into your neighborhood.
The Scizz
On Saturday the DGWU crew (
and Joe!) recorded our
newest episode of the CrapTastiCast. We then proceded to drink high alcohol-content beers for several hours. I of course followed this up by returning home, drinking more, and then returning to Manhattan with the Yachtsman for more booze partaking. Needless to say on Sunday I was battling a vicious hangover. With my body destroyed and nothing to, I decided to watch some movie trailers online. After watching seven or eight of the blockbusters that are sure to make this summer both very lucrative and nerd-filled, an idea popped in my head. What if there was away I could combine two of my dearest passions? No, not Cadbury Cream Eggs and flash frying (
hint: that has already been done, and it is amazing). I’m talking about summer movies and the Buffalo Sabres. Both are highly entertaining, force me to fill myself with unhealthy food and drink, and in the end, mostly infuriate me. Thus this un-educated brainchild was born. Each movie’s title and release date will be followed by the trailer, and then the best corresponding Sabres personality. I also decided to split the review into four separate sections; May today, with June, July, and August following in the next couple of weeks. Welcome to the Scizz Summer Movie Preview: Sabres Edition - May 2011
Thor - May 6th
Tyler Myers
I realize this film has been out for almost two weeks now, but it is still killing it at the box office and I have yet to see it. Thor, of course is based on the Marvel comic and is the story of an Asgardian God that has been exiled from his home to Earth. There, he must help a hot-ass Natalie Portman to save the world. Who else better than Tyler Myers fits the role of a hammer-wielding God of thunder put in charge of saving the day? Psycho T landed on planet Buffalo in 2010 and we immediately saw a guy that could help win the Cup (aka save the world).
He is developing before our eyes and already plays like a superhero. Plus Thor has to battle ugly ice giants and that only led to one thought; Zdeno Chara, anyone?
Bridesmaids - May 13th
Nathan Gerbe
I know what you are thinking. “How dare you compare Nathan Gerbe to a movie all about women in dresses!!!”, but please hear me out. I have heard nothing but amazing things about this film. Apparently at the genius direction of Paul Feig and the acting of SNL member Kristen Wiig, they created a piece of work that is not what it seemed to many of us at first sight. It is a wedding movie with a mostly female cast that has the comedy style of Old School and Hangover, even though it appears to be a chick flick on the surface. Now how many of you last season thought Nathan Gerbe was just an undersized player that would never be a fan favorite or emotional team leader? SEE! The little guy may not look like a big, bruising star but when he amps up, fans go nuts and he can the push team to victory (
see spin-o-rama on 4/8/2011).
Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides - May 20th
Derek Roy
I look to the famous Johnny Depp character of Captain Jack Sparrow for this comparison. Although not a captain (yet), Roysie was an alternate and is definitely considered a team leader. Before he went down this season he was having a career year and was considered by many to be one of the only players on the team that appeared to give a shit. Cap’n Jack also has a certain cockiness and flamboyance that reminds me of Roysie during his now
infamous and bizarre nights on Chippewa. Plus, I have always said that if I could party with a celebrity, it would be Depp, and if I have a choice to hit the town with a Buffalo Sabre, you better believe it will be with this Kangol hat wearing sunovabitch!
The Hangover Part 2 - May 26th
Chris Butler
There. I finally said his name again. Much like the first film, Hangover Part 2 involves a group of friends getting hammered and trying to remember the night before? This is exactly how I feel about Butler after watching his playoff performance. I keep trying to remember all the good stuff he did at the end of the regular season, but it has proven to be quite difficult. I am continually searching for clues about what exactly happened that may have turned him into the doorstep of that first round series. Speaking of which, if anyone happens to know if Dmitri Kalinin was seen around Buffalo or Philadelphia from April 14 - 26, please contact
@TheScizz immediately.
That does it for the May round of the Summer preview. Check back in the next few days for my look at the films of June and the Sabres that best represent them. I'll deal with mutants, cosmic heroes, government secrets, and a comedic woman....and then I'll write about the movies! ZING!