Ever since the loss of Drury and Briere began the long death march into obscurity for the franchise, I have come across many Buffalo fans who take pride in saying to me some variation of "I don't give a shit about the Sabres until the BIlls season ends." This can mean its literal end around New Year's, or its figurative end which typically comes sometime between Columbus Day and Thanksgiving. Regardless, this has always struck me as strange, like people who say things like "I don't follow the news," that prideful ignorance that they believe conveys honor and a hip aloofness when really it just repels others as if they'd spent the last hour rolling around in raw sewage at the Ralph. Obviously, I am not one of those people, notably because I can concentrate on more than one sporting event in a given week and unlike the ignorant boobs you'll encounter above, I can understand a piece of writing longer and more complex than a fantasy football injury report.
I scrolled through my twitter before sitting down to write this, in an attempt to ascertain what was being said about the captain selections as well as any general predictions for the season considering it officially starts tonight. I was able to scroll back eight minutes before I exited out in frustration. Between the government shutdown and the start of the Sabres season, I highly recommend sealing your phone in a heavy duty freezer bag and burying it in your backyard for at least a few weeks because the terrible jokes about the fomer and the crippling negativity about the latter (yes, from TBN and WGR MUCH more than any of us lowly bloggers or simple minded fans) could totally ruin October.
The Bills have shown how far a little change can go as far as goodwill with the fan base and the media. Sure, you have Sullivan's personal vendetta against Mario and the professional animosity between the WGR afternoon show and Stevie Johnson, but the fans for the most part can see these conflicts as what they are, not as anything respectable to take into a debate you may have with friends, family or coworkers. The caricature of the combative, crotchety reporter with a smartphone instead of a pencil and pad is simply too spot on to be missed. Meanwhile twitter during Bills games is generally enjoyable because after so many years we're all on the same page. There's jokes, there's the ebb and flow of hate and despair that comes from watching four one-possession games come down to the final drive or two. It's jovial. There's less nonsense.
Sad. And adorable.
The Barrister & The Scizz
It was a rainy, misty, shitty day in New York City on Thursday. The perfect setting for our second installment of Infinite Sadness, one of the peripheral cogs in the Deeg Podcast Industries. Scizz, still sitting in the solitude of his sobriety, and I, still sitting in my own sweat and overworked misery, got together via Skype to discuss some of the more recent sports news that makes us infinitely sad.
While the arc of our conversation is often tangential, we touch on the NHL playoffs and how it's been to watch hockey suddenly get big in the big market of NYC, and then have a reflective discussion on how unsurprised we are to see that the Buffalo Sabres have not invited us and our stockpile of dick jokes to attend next month's Blogger Summit. Hint: It's Scizz's fault. Second Hint: It's also Alex Sulzer's fault.
This was a ton of fun to make, as always, and includes musical interludes from Incubus, Ben Folds Five and Biggie Smalls. Enjoy by streaming or downloading below.
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The haircut alone is worth 15 jokes
Welcome to episode 10 of the not-so-famous DGWU CrapTastiCast. We follow up last week's brilliant Nick Mendola episode with this absolute masterpiece of shit. This week we ventured out of studio to record at Megsie's apartment with her brand spankin' new road equipment.....and we did so without Megsie. Yeah I know, I have no clue why she would let us animals into her apartment unsupervised either. All around awesome guy and creator of our intro music, Mondee Torres helped us out this week and made sure the streak of awfulness starts up again.
The episode features all the nonsense you have come to know and love from your favorite rambling morons, Including a solid two minutes of arguing over what episode number this actually was. IT IS TEN, YACHTSMAN! Douche. We also welcome Apologist back from the dead and talk baseball allegiances and obscure player names, the Sabres Summit, what will happen when the Bills move to L.A., videogames, Tim Thomas (the basketball player of course), the NFL lockout, inferiority complexes, why we are frustrating idiots, ESPN hate, Megsie's book collection, and naturally we take faceless potshots at people we don't know. Everything is back to normal. Mondee even adds in a solid heavy metal outro for us. Name that tune in the comments section (we're looking at you Phil). Enjoy the show, and if you haven't subscribed to the CrapTastiCast via iTunes or Libsyn
yet, please do us a solid and get on that chief.
Follow us on twitter @DGWUSports and on facebook here.
-I am a poor sport. I hate losing and it does not matter if it is a pick-up basketball game with friends, an essay writing contest in college, or board games on date night with my girlfriend. I can admit to this and it is a problem I will probably never fix. I also hate when teams I dislike win. This is why I will not congratulate the Bruins on winning the Cup. Immature? Absolutely. I do not care, and I am still convincing myself that Tim Thomas is a closet Nazi.
This is because I really, really, really hate Boston. It stems from several occurrences in my life. 1) Before the Sawx won the World Series in 2004, I always despised the way Boston fans bitched and moaned about the epic baseball championship drought. Their other three professional sports teams had combined for 24 total championships, compared the giant ZERO my teams have experienced. I viewed them as spoiled brats. (Sidenote: I realize that some people are only Red Sox fans, and those people I am usually willing to let it slide.) 2) I have only been to Boston twice, and both times it was a terrible experience. People were rude, it smelled like fish, and a guy named Tommy threatened to hit me because I was wearing a Cubs hat…seriously. I was walking down the street, nowhere near Fenway and this brooding giant says "I should smack your face off for wearing that hat in my town". I have no idea if his name was Tommy but it seems like a safe assumption. 3) All of their franchises are incredibly easy to hate. Even Boston fans can admit to this. Brady, Belichick, Schilling, Papelbon, Chara, Garnett…I hate all of these guys. ESPECIALLY THAT NAZI LOVING TIM THOMAS! END RANT!No congrats from this guy. I am going to stay bitter and continue with my plot to place lite brights all over the city of Boston. That seems to scare them.
You stay classy Vancouver
-On to Vancouver. I know they were totally whiny during the playoffs and it made them hard to root for. Luongo is jack-wagon and the Sedin twins are b-i-otches. I get this. That is why last night I DVR’d the game and watched True Grit in the park while chugging back a magnum of wine. I did not want either team to win, and after seeing the way all of those douche-nozzle fans reacted after the loss, I wish that both teams would have been abducted by the Super 8 alien and held hostage in a dark cave, forcing the NHL to allow Tampa Bay and San Jose play for the cup. That would have been stupendous.
-Brian Bund of Buffalowins
wrote a great post earlier today telling hockey fans to relax. I agreed with most of what he had to say (not so much about the Two & A Half Men being a good show part, sorry Brian). After I read it, we briefly chatted on twitter and the point came up that we as fans (old AND new) have become way too dismissive of other fans. When the hell did this “I’m right, you’re wrong” mentality take over? Seeing some of these twitter battles take place reminds me of losers like Skip Bayless, Colin Cowherd, and every shmuck on Around The Horn. How about making valid points and not dismissing everyone with sarcasm and a know-it-all attitude? We are better than this people! I know our site is mostly based in humor and we RARELY act like we actually know what we are talking about, but there is an insane amount of knowledge in the heads of the assholes that run this blog and when we want to make a point, we will. I guarantee none of us will just say “whatever, you’re an idiot” or tell people that they don’t know anything about hockey or any sport for that matter because we are in a pissy mood. A blog or a message board account gives you a platform to speak your mind in any way, shape, or form you would like, however if you take the “well I’m right, and you’re wrong” route, prepare to be dismantled. I’m not keeping the Yachtsman on a leash anymore. You’ve been warned.
-I just realized everything I previously wrote may completely contradict itself. Oh well, eff it. Hopefully you got my point.
-I know I can be a real pain in the ass with self promotion, but seriously if you have not checked out episode nine of the CrapTastiCast
yet, please download it and take a listen. I still can’t believe Nick Mendola
agreed to talk to us. He is such a great figure for Buffalo and the interview touches on some amazing points involving the city. We appreciate all the readers of the site and if you could spread the word on that interview, we would be in your debt.
Feel free to determine which blogger is which and leave it in the comment area.
-The Buffalo Sabres Blogger Summit is happening today at 6:30pm. I have to admit that the whole thing is pretty cool. I’d like to see some more snarkiness and cynicism on the invite list, but that’s because we here at DGWU are total jerk-offs. We know that Phil at BBG
will be our proxy and representing us in a much more sophisticated and less douchey manner (he doesn't know this, and I am totally making it up). Honestly though, I am glad that the whole thing is taking place, and this blog never thought we would ever be invited. We have absolutely no right to be there. First of all, we are all in NYC and possibly a little out of touch with Buffalo. Second, have you read this site or listened to our podcast? Holy hell we are a natural disaster of immense proportions. Yachtsman would be screaming at Ted Black about the locker rooms not being ready in time for free agency and that somehow it is a conspiracy involving Larry Quinn. Apologist would be so baked we would start asking questions about Dirk Nowitzki and would most likely walk out mid-conference to grab some Jim's Steak Out. Barrister would be at least seven shots of Jameson deep and telling creepy, childhood church camp stories. And Finally, I would be asking questions like “how much tail does Timmy Connolly REALLY pull on an average weekend?”, or maybe “What’s it like to hang out with Matt Ellis? Is it true smell like oak and fresh pine needles?” See what I mean? DISASTER.
-Which brings me to a very important announcement: Since we have no business being at the Sabre Summit, I decided to create our own. I am proud to bring to you, tonight at 7pm not sharp, the 2011 NYC Sabre Summit. The conference will feature yours truly and the rest of the DGWU Crew, as well as Joe from Buffalowins and maybe some other special guests! (Hint: I have reached out to Bob Corkum’s people aka his mom) The Summit will take place at Drop-Off Service
on 211 Avenue A and will feature delicious craft beers, shots of Irish whiskey, and zero journalistic integrity. As Brian Bund said to me earlier, “NYC Sabre Summit: Where drinking makes you forget you’re not at the real summit.”
Cheers everyone. Enjoy the blogger takeover today, and make sure you clean your mom’s basement before you head over to HSBC (nerd jokes!). And if you see Matt Ellis, tell him I said hi and NO, I WILL NOT STOP SENDING HIM LETTERS UNTIL HE RESPONDS!
Why won't you love me, Matty? Wow I'm creepy.
Remember to follow us on twitter @DGWUSports
And yours truly on twitter @TheScizz