I wish I was as excited as this guy.
The Scizz w/ The Apologist and Joe Pinzone
It's that time of year again. The Sabres are making their ever so late playoff push, the Bills are preparing for the draft after a mediocre....waaaaaait, I mean spectacular free agency run, and the biggest event in pro wrestling is about to go down.
Wrestlemania. This Sunday, the 28th in a series of awesomeness continues. It is the day where a bunch of adults who run this god-forsaken blog get together, drink beer, and watch grown men in their underwear wrestle with each other. HOT.
It should also be noted that during the year, most of us pay little to no attention to the "sport" or "sports entertainment" if you will. Yet, for some reason, when the Super Bowl of wrestling goes down, we get sucked in. It could be just another excuse for all of us to get drunk together and make asses of ourselves, but what it really comes down to is memories. Memories from childhood through teenage years through college debauchery in which wrestling played a weekly role in our lives. That's what this post is about: Three grown men sharing their favorite Wrestlemania moments. SAD.
I'll start with Joe Pinzone, on loan to us from Buffalo Wins, from....himself. If you follow Joe on twitter (and WHO DOESN'T, RIGHT GUYS?), then you'll already know that Joe is probably the biggest fan of all of us. Which also means his write-up of his fave moment is definitely the most interesting and well-written.
Take it away, Joe. @JoeBuffaloWins
To me, the 90s seemed to represent an era when the younger generation wanted to be heard and say fuck off to the authority. No one wanted a superhero. Superheroes are for chumps. You felt it in music with the grunge scene and every rock band trying to either kill themselves or their parents or tell someone else to fuck off. You could sense it in television as no one wanted to watch happy sitcoms like Full House or Urkel. Instead, they wanted to watch a white trash family like The Connors in Roseanne. In other words, the audience was looking for an edge. No more cookie cutter shit. That's not how the real world works and I want to relate to something that feels real.In wrestling, the cookie cutter image was still running wild. You had guys like Bret Hart, Macho Man (RIP) and Hulk Hogan, who all had a couple of catch phrases and gave out chicken scratch autographs to appease the fans, but they were epically lame when it came to personalities. People wanted an edge. Someone they could live vicariously through. That man was Steve Austin. Steve Austin's rise to being a wrestling icon wasn't suppose to happen. It was a mistake, just like The Scizz being conceived. (Editor note: This is actually very accurate) He was suppose to be a mid-carder. Nothing more. Through hard work and the changing of pop culture, Steve Austin's rise happened pretty quickly. Before Steve battled Bret Hart at Survivor Series (November) in 1997, he was as a heel. No real difference from some of the past bad ass heels like the Four Horsemen or the Free Birds, but as I said, the times were a changing. More importantly, so was Steve. Austin didn't have this great range with his promos in WCW or when he first debuted in WWE, but once he found himself, the game changed. If you youtube some of his interviews with Bret Hart up to that point, they are goldmines of humor and toughness. Austin ended up losing to Hart at Survivor Series, but because of his awesome, badass approach, he started getting more cheers than boos. More signs were showing up in the crowd. Whether you were a 8-year old or a 24-year old, you loved the son of a bitch. Fast forward 6 months to his rematch with Hart at Wrestlemania 13, which in my opinion, changed the business and set the standard for what a wrestling match should be. It was an "I quit" match, which the only way you could beat your opponent was if they said those two magic words: I quit. The best thing to do right now is youtube the match. My words won't be able to describe the bloodbath that occurred. It was one of those physical matches that made you think wrestling was real (Which it is..duh!). Yes, wrestling can be laughable when done half ass with poor matches, and even shittier interviews, however, when you can get it right, it can be downright epic. Austin vs Hart was that epic confrontation. It was about Hart's frustration with the WWE fans, who thought his old 80's schtick was finished, and he couldn't deal with it. It was about how Austin wore his anger like a cloak, because of a perceived lack of respect from authority, it became his ally...his darker side. Two things that I can point out:1) Austin was the heel and Hart was the baby face heading into this match. Yes, there were probably a good 30% of the crowd rooting for Austin to begin with, but WWE had tried to force feed Bret as the face in this one. However, in a moment that I haven't seen since and the Russian crowd turned on Ivan Drago, they cheered like crazy for Austin. It wasn't because of a microphone or a something force fed by the writers, it was something genuine. The fans believed in Austin because he was anti-establishment, just like them. They wanted to tell their parents, teachers, and bosses to fuck off, and Austin was doing it for them. 2) The crescendo for this moment came when Austin was in Bret Hart's finishing move, The Sharp Shooter. With the crowd at a fever pitch, Austin's forehead was dripping out blood like a faucet. It was awesome. It was a holy shit moment. As the ref asked Austin if he wanted to quit, Austin, being the badass that he is, kept yelling "no" while the blood kept coming out. At one point, he almost broke the hold and the crowd went crazy thinking he did. Alas, he broke it for a few short moments, but Hart snatched it back in. Instead of quitting, Austin passed out. Hart won, but Austin didn't say those two words. A star was born. Austin walked back to the locker room getting a standing ovation from the fans and they didn't stop cheering for the rest of career.
Alright, my turn to be lame. @TheScizzFor me, this was incredibly easy. No need to over think it and narrow down from some excruciatingly long list, the choice was simple. The Rock. Hollywood Hulk Hogan. Wrestlemania 18.The match dubbed Icon vs. Icon was never expected to be the match it became. It was there for pure entertainment, as nobody, including me, ever though that 107 year old Hogan could still put on a quality match, even if he was being carried by "electrifying one", The Rock. In fact, as a Junior in college and preparing to get blitzed on a Sunday night and watch with friends, I remember being more excited for the other matches on the card, namely HHH vs. Chris Jericho and Ric Flair vs. Undertaker.What went down, is still one of the coolest "sports" moment of my life. (Yes, I understand it's fake, hence the quotation marks shithead) The build up to the match was somewhat laughable. Owner Vince McMahon no longer loved the company he created and had decided to bring in the posion known as the NWO, who lead the WWE's rival company, WCW, past them in rating years ago. The members: Hogan, Scott Hall, and Kevin Nash were never expected to work for the company ever again, but here they were taunting the WWE wrestlers and causing "problems" at every turn. The most innaproppriately hysterical being when Hogan, driving a semi-truck, ran it full speed into an ambulance supposedly a just injured Rock. Hogan uttered the words "I'm going to cripple his candy-ass as you could see him visibly shaking from the effort just to climb into the big rig. The Rock returned two weeks later. From a SEMI smashing into an AMBULANCE at FULL SPEED that was INSIDE OF. Isn't wrestling great?Anyways, with all of that build up said and done, Hogan was the obvious villain heading into the match, with the Rock as the crowd-favorite hero who everyone, including my friends and I, absolutely loved. But then something happened. After the two traded punches, body slams, and siganture moves, the crowd slowly stopped cheering for the Rock, and started cheering for Hulk. I know, I know, this sounds just like Joe's Hart Vs. Austin pick, but it was different. The crowd wasn't cheering for Hulk Hogan because he was an anti-hero, they were cheering because a flood of memories and emotions from their childhood started entering into their minds. They were watching their childhood idol, Hulk Hogan wrestle in his first WWE match in over 10 years against "The Great One", and it looked like he never missed a beat. In an instant, Hulkamania was reborn, and it didn't matter how popular the Rock was, every adult in that crowd, and at home immediately returned to the days of Hogan telling them to say their prayers and take their vitamins. I was one of them. And, in great Rock fashion, as he started to get booed, he IMMEDIATELY relapsed into his old villanious persona, staring down the crowd and talking shit. It was awesome.In the end, the Rock won, but the crowd gave both men a standing ovation, and the next night on RAW, the WWE officially turned Hogan back to a crowd favorite, soon to be followed by his old red and yellow gear, complete with "Real American" blaring as his entrance music. Now, if only he could get rid of that sex tape, gold-digging ex-wife, manly daughter, and murderer son, he'd be all set.
Icon vs. Icon
and hot off the presses, it's the Apologist with another Hogan moment, but from way back in the day. @Sam_HartmanThere never has been, nor will there ever be a bigger match, in my eyes, than the Ultimate Warrior facing Hulk Hogan for "the Ultimate Challenge" at Wrestlemania VI. Even people who have never given more than a second glance at pro-wrestling know who these two stars are. Since slamming Andre the Giant, Hulk Hogan had been far and away the biggest star in professional wrestling for most of the 80's. But when the Ultimate Warrior broke onto the scene, people could tell this was the future star of the WWF. So Vince McMahon, set them up for one of the biggest main event's in wrestling's history. Champion versus champion.
To be fair, I was hardly aware of wrestling at the time. It wasn't until years later, strolling through Blockbuster (Remember those? No? Nevermind.), that I discovered it on VHS (Remember THAT? No? Geez, I'm getting old.) and ran home to watch it immediately. It was everything you could ever want in a wrestling match. Two huge stars at the height of their popularity, both defending titles, both with the crowd on their side. It was one of those rare moments in pro-wrestling where no one will be disappointed in the outcome, as long as the match is fun to watch. And the Hulkster and Warrior did not disappoint. For twenty minutes they fought in and out of the ring, using every move in their respective repertoires. And did I mention the match was called by the best commentating duo of all time, Bobby "The Brain" Heenan and Gorilla Monsoon? In the end, the Warrior survived Hulk's signature finishing routine, counter-attacking with his own finisher (Editor Note: The Gorilla Press!) and took both titles.
Now, maybe this match would be considered a snoozer by modern pro-wrestling fans, but I believe it's charm still shines through.
Sure. Hulk & Warrior's moves and theatrics shown against modern wrestling seem dated. Certainly Hulk's legdrop was never very impressive. But don't tell me we've moved WAY beyond this. The only difference between Hulk's legdrop and say, "the People's Elbow", is a couple dance moves. And besides, wrestling has never been about wrestling. It's about the pomp & circumstance. It's about the spectacle. And maybe there have been equally touted superstar vs superstar main events in similarly grand settings, but this one set the standard for how you treat a match of this magnitude.
Aps' choice makes much more sense now.
Still not enough wrestling? Stay tuned for the next CrapTastiCast, as we plan to record it this Sunday, before, during, and after this epic event. Watcha gonna do, brotha??
With only about two months left until the big debuts of Robyn Regehr, Christian Ehrhoff, and Ville Leino, Sabres news has been ridiculously slow. Until Mark-Andy signs and a few chumps are dumped to the AHL, there isn't a whole lot going on....unless you count the Bills, but who cares about those guys, right?
I kid. But this post is about neither the Bills or the Sabres. For today, I head back to write about professional wrestling and what I feel is one of the most important parts of the genre....the debut. You see, I grew up watching wrestling in the late 80's and then watched it's reinvention in the late 90's. During this time, with the battle of WWF vs. WCW vs ECW raging, you consistently saw wrestlers jumping back and forth, without warning to the separate federations. Yes, I know it is all scripted, but when you could watch the flagship shows each week (RAW, Nitro) and never know who was going to show up next, it added a sense of excitement and surprise that has been lacking for the past 10 years. The first time a wrestler would appear with their new federation could sometimes make or break their career. If you don't believe me, watch the video below:
That right there is a man named Fred Ottman, most famous for his role as "Tugboat" or "Typhoon in the WWF in the 80's and 90's. He made the jump to WCW in 1993 and that was supposed to be his big debut as "The Shockmaster". You just witnessed the end of his career. Not only was the glitter storm trooper helmet and fur vest an awful idea, but the falling out of the wall and losing his mask may be one of the most unintentionally funny moments in professional wrestling history. The point is, the debut is everything. It's what the fans first see and what they usually remember the most. So as we wait for the debuts of the Sabres' new big three, I decided to compile a list of the top 10 greatest debuts in professional wrestling history.
Between myself and an esteemed panel of about 12 other gentleman that included The Yachtsman, Apologist, Joe from Buffalo Wins
, past guest contributor NateDogg (not the guy from Ep 13 of the CrapTastiCast
), and one of the biggest wrestling fans I know, stevewxfan
(check out his cool weather blog here
), I was able to construct what I believe is a solid list. Joe was even gracious enough to include some great commentary on his top picks.
Below are picks 10 through 6. It was getting pretty long, so check back on Monday for selections 5 through 1. If you hate wrestling, so be it, but I had an effin spectacular time working on this so shut your hole and go back to capgeek. Too much?
10) Earthquake (John Tenta) - November 11th, 1989
I think most of the guys on the panel either forgot about this one, or possibly weren't even watching wrestling when it happened. I will always remember this debut because as an eight year old kid, I was so upset I think I may have cried. Ultimate Warrior was possibly my favorite wrestler, and to see him being man-handled by a bozo like Dino Bravo with this new gigantic man was shocking and appalling to me. Again, I was eight, so the "guy from the crowd" was beyond believable to me. This is an excellent debut. Earthquake, as he would come to be known as, went on to main event against Hulk Hogan and had a very long and successful career. The element of surprise is KEY in a good debut.
9) Eric Bischoff - July 15th, 2002
This was around the time I started to lose interest in wrestling. I was still watching, but my heart wasn't there and I was a junior in college so I had other priorities (booze, girls, booze, parties, booze). I do remember what a huge deal this was, but I'm going to defer to Joe on this one because.....well he can do a much better job than I can explaining how epic Bischoff's debut actually was for the wrestling world.
Joe's take: About a year after WCW was purchased by WWE, Vince McMahon did the unthinkable, he gave Eric Bishcoff (Formerly in charge of WCW) a job! No one, and I mean, no one saw this coming! Eric Bischoff and Vince McMahon hated each other. It would be like Ted Nolan giving John Muckler a job. For almost a decade, the two of them exchanged insults, wrestlers and tons of cash to knock the other guy out. Vince won out. However, it the summer of 2002, WWE was growing stale and they needed to shake things up. So, Vince decided to bring Bischoff in to run Monday Night raw as the GM (Kayfabe). Easy E surprised everyone, including people in the locker room, when they had no idea Vince would hire his long-time nemesis. I remember when he came out, there was no tease or build up, Vince just announced that Eric was the man in charge of Raw. Never would have saw that coming four years earlier. I just remember that they hugged afterwords. Yup, Nolan and Muckler hugging, I tell you!
8) The Radicalz - January 31st, 2000
I originally wanted this to be a spot for Degeneration X (The DGWU of wrestling), but as I researched I found that DX never had a legitimate debut. They just gradually became a team over time and there was no big "boom here we are" moment.
I decided to go with the team of Eddie Guerrero, Dean Malenko, Perry Saturn, and Chris Benoit. The story behind this debut was that all four of their contracts were expiring with WCW at the same exact time, and they supposedly made a pact to either stay or leave together. When WCW low-balled them on new contracts, they called Vince McMahon and jumped ship. This all happened in a matter of a couple days and it was huge in the wrestling world. All four men were career WCW guys who had never stepped foot in a WWF ring. On top of that, all four men were considered some of the best technical wrestlers in the business. DX were the bad guys at the time, so why not bring in these four to counter them? It was perfect timing. The WWF placed them in the front row like they just happened to be attending the show without contracts, giving that whole CM Punk type of "wait, is this for real or not?" feeling. As soon as they jumped the barrier, the crowd went nuts, and thus the Radicalz were born.
7) The Big Show (Paul Wight/The Giant) - February 14th, 1999
Paul Wight was know as "The Giant" in WCW and is famous for being billed at 7 foot, 485 lbs. He makes Howard Ballard look like....well.....me. Paul was also known as the perfect big man wrestler and could put on solid matches with men twice his size, while somewhat keeping up with their pace. This is why once his WCW contract ran up, a bidding war ensued and on February 9th, Paul Wight signed a ten-year contract with the WWF (Christian Ehrhoff?). Five days later he made his debut as a villain attempting to help the evil Vince McMahon win a steel cage match against the anti-hero Stone Cold Steve Austin.
The two really cool aspects of his debut were the fact that he appeared just five days after signing a new contract, totally surprising viewers that the monster had come to WWF, and also the fact that he climbs out THROUGH THE RING and then tosses Austin THROUGH THE CAGE. High school senior me thought that was pretty cool. Then again I also liked Limp Bizkit and DMX. Don't judge me.
5) Hulk Hogan back to the WWF - February 17th / March 17th / April 4th, 2002
Alright so this one is complicated. Let me explian before I turn it back over to Joe. When Hogan returned to the WWF in 2002, it was supposed to be as his bad guy persona "Hollywood" Hulk Hogan. He re-entered the WWE with his fellow NWO members Scott Hall and Kevin Nash and they were meant to reek havoc on the wrestling organization. This didn't work out as planned, in fact, it worked out better. Here is Joe to explain a little more.
Joe's Take: When WWE bought out WCW, it not only was the end of WCW and the Monday Night wars, but also the end of the height of the 90's wrestling boom. They always say, competition brings out the best in people and without WCW, I think the WWE got complacent. However, if there was one thing we got out of WCW going down in flames, was how Hulk Hogan came back to the WWE. No one ever would have thought he'd come back to Vince McMahon's company. I mean, he left him for greener pastures and was obsessed with putting the WWE out of business. This was like Lou Saban or Bill Polian coming back to work for Ralph Wilson. Anyways, his return was incredible, as Hogan went back to his roots of being a good guy. If you ever want to watch a cool wrestling youtube video, check out Rock vs Hogan Wrestlemania 18. The fans in Toronto went ape shit for Hogan! The problem was, they weren't suppose to do that! Hogan was the bad guy and Rock was the face. The best part about the match was when Hogan "Hulked up" (It's when Hogan looks to be out of gas, but miraculously, he gets his second wind and does the finger point). That was the first time Hogan did that since 1995. Epic stuff.
Note from the Scizz: The video embedded below is the entire match from Wrestlemania 18. One thing that Joe didn't mention was how well the Rock completely changes his attitude from good guy to bad guy as soon as he can tell the crowd wants Hogan to win. Classic stuff. Skip to the 13:25 min. mark to see the crowd really turn on The Rock, and then the 17 min. mark to see the finish and Hogan help out the Rock once the NWO attacks.
The three dates above represent the different moments of Hogan re-debuting; The NWO, his "turn" back to good at Wrestlemania 18, and finally the moment he completely returned to the Hogan of old. The first video is obviously his return with the NWO, the second is at WM18, and below you can see the first time he walked out onto a WWF stage in the classic red and yellow trunks for the first time in almost 10 years. Jump to the 4:30 min. mark to skip HHH rambling and see the Hulkster's entrance. Still gives me chills.
This list was not easy. After eveybody's feedback I had almost 40 different debuts in wrestling to sift through. My original top 10 looks NOTHING like the final list, which is why I'm glad I got outside input. Sometimes certain monents stick out to others more than they do you. For example, I always thought Scott Steiner's final return to the WWF at Survivor Series in NYC was pretty cool, but not a single other person listed it. However, the top five were listed on 75% of everybody's lists, but the order still surprised me.. Thanks to everyone for their help, and especially Joe for his awesome commentary!
Skip back on over on Monday morning for Part two. Cheers.
With all of the wrestling talk lately, I couldn't resist
Exciting times people. The Sabres are playing fantastic hockey
and on the verge of a playoff berth
. The Rock is returning to the ring in 2012 to actually wrestle
. And this Saturday the DGWU crew gathers to record their maiden podcast. It currently does not have a title, nor a definitive format, but hey, get the three of us in a small room with plenty of booze in our systems and it's bound to get interesting....and indubitably awkward.
That said, I think I better bring the mood back down to Buff-a-low standards. (See what I did there!) The Bills still suck, and with the 2011 NFL draft fast approaching, the EPIC FAIL series must continue. Ladies and gents, the draft class of 2008.*Sidenote: I decided to split this into two sections because I was having major posting issues and lost my column about 4 times before it would save. I'm worn out and need to walk away, so the rest of the picks will go up tomorrow or later this weekend.
7th round: Kennard Cox - Defensive Back - Pittsburgh
Kennard never got a real shot in Buffalo. He joined the likes of C.J. Ah You and Aaron Merz as players who never saw one snap as a Buffalo Bill. Released even before pre-season, Kennard has actually gone on to a decent special teams career with Jacksonville and Seattle. But oh what fun the word play could have been, right? "You think your secondary is strong? Ours is COX STRONG!" Priceless.
Why so sacrilegious?
7th round: Steve Johnson - Wide Receiver - Kentucky
Hey everybody look, a late round steal! Oh thank heavens for this gem because in all honesty, the rest of this draft class is f*cking disgusting. I mean like human centipede disgusting. I had a stomach virus last week and after looking over the draft board, I almost immediately reverted back to projectile vomiting on the PATH train tracks. Which reminds me! There are no garbage cans down there! NOT A ONE! Why the hell would you not think to include that in an underground train station?? Wait, what was I talking about? Oh right, Stevie Johnson is awesome. Except for maybe that whole blaming God for letting him drop a game-winning touchdown catch
. Not the best choice.
Another vague wrestling reference!
7th round: Demetrius Bell- Offensive Tackle - Northwestern State-Lousiana
By now you should all know the background story on Demetrius Bell. However, since I find it to be a particularly phenomenal tale, let us review: Bell is the illegitimate son of WCW-PPV wrestler and NBA legend Karl Malone. I did not make that up. The best part is what a complete tool Malone has been about the whole situation
. Besides all of that shit-show, Bell has turned out to be a solid 7th round pick. I am by no means jumping on this guy's bandwagon yet, because he has been nothing more than a serviceable lineman up until now. But with these horrific draft classes, you have to enjoy something. The next three picks will display this wonderfully.
Front office or actual players? You decide.
6th round: Xavier Omon- Running Back - Northwest Missouri State5th round: Alvin Bowen- Outside Linebacker - Iowa State4th round: Derek Fine- Tight End - Kansas
Three players drafted. Three players off the team within two seasons.
Bowen injured himself during training camp and never played a down. Fine, a TE/H-Back hybrid was drafted right after the front office said they wanted to move away from using H-backs. That went well. Lastly, Omon took over the third-string RB role, but with the drafting of Spiller and the Bills' need to showcase Marshawn for a trade
, was left on the outside looking in. All three are still in the league but put up zero's in every possible stat category last season. DRAFT GOOD!
Come back for Section B this weekend! Until then, I'm gonna sliiiiiide away from The Yachtsman's hard rock movement and present a band that I have been fairly obsessed about over the last 6 months. Enjoy the Motown/Indie Rock stylin's of FITZ & The Tantrums. GO SABRES!!!!!!