Football is back. Have we mentioned that yet here at DGWUS? We’re rather excited. The slowest segment of the sports year is over and football is back to bludgeon us into submission. And if last Thursday night’s opening salvo was any indicator, this year could get ugly real fast. Both the Barrister and I have already told you how we feel about this coming football season as a whole, but now it’s time to dig in and focus on our opening opponent, the Baltimore Ravens.
Last year was a rough one for the Ravens. They only won 5 games, they started four different QBs, their running back lost half his season to a gruesome broken arm, Suggs was out, and, well, NO ONE felt sorry for them because Ray Rice. That was only two seasons ago. You’re not off the hook yet for employing that guy. Also, you won a Super Bowl like 3 years ago and missed the playoffs for only the 2nd time since 2008. Zero sympathy from this side of the aisle.
But really not much has changed in the city by Chesapeake Bay. John Harbaugh is still mad about everything. The only receiver you recognize is still Steve Smith. Ray Lewis still gets to judge people’s life choices because he has two Super Bowl rings and he used to dance when he came out of the tunnel. We’re still discussing the “eliteness” of Joe Flacco every. single. year. because God forbid we just say, “He’s the Eli Manning of the DC Metro area” and stop caring about him. (Seriously. He’s 31, he’s been in the league since 2008, and people still treat him like he’s a project they’ve had stashed on the sidelines. He’s just a guy who plays quarterback pretty well. End of debate.) Oh! And all of their success over the last 20 years still should belong to Cleveland. So, you know… Baltimore.
I’m sure the Bills are eager to end all the offseason chatter and get the game started. There has been plenty of speculation this offseason about the personnel and coaching decisions they’ve made. Was it a mistake to bring in Rob Ryan? Can Tyrod Taylor take “the next step™”? Is this the year Sammy Watkins becomes a household name? Will Reggie Bush be a difference maker? How much are we going to miss Mario Williams? Aren’t you getting tired of all these questions?
Let's do this.