This is going to be a fun night.
The Barrister
I can't claim to have anything major to say these days. I'm not inclined to get too worked up about the endless conversations about what blogging means and what it means in the Buffalo sports universe in particular. Shit, most of what I've written here in the past few months is far from relevant to the Buffalo sports scene, what with my general disdain for speculating about drafts and free agents and teams that are a few months away from playing games that count. By the time the Sabres season comes around, I'll have a baby boy to dote on and, I imagine, far less time to dwell on these bizarre loves of mine. So, needless to say, I'm having my fun now.
And that fun, right now, is New York Mets baseball.
Last night, the DGWU Sports crew hit Citi Field for game two in this series against the Orioles. Game one, if you happened to be under a rock yesterday, was RA Dickey's second straight one-hitter. The former Buffalo Bison is pitching as good as anybody in the league right now, and better than the team's "ace," Johan Santana. As for Johan, he followed suit with a gem of his own last night, leading the Mets to their second straight shutout against Baltimore. Santana was in complete control through his six innings last night, and it was good to see following two less-than-inspiring outings which, in turn, followed his epic no hitter on June 1st.
The Deeg had an absurdly fun time last night as we were thoroughly over-served and unsurprisingly giddy to have a chance to hang out again. Yachtsman stepped on a homeless guy on the subway, Scizz threatened the same guy with a round of old-timey boxing, and Apologist got over the loss of his Orioles by watching Lebron "Pool Boy" James pull off some heroics of his own. And me? I pretended to not know any of those clowns while barely containing my laughter.
We're really good at this.
Needless to say, live-blogging tonight seems to be an appropriate follow-up to those shenanigans since I'm probably still drunk and since these live blogs usually end up being an excuse for me to find infantile pictures on the internet and giggle like a moron.
Again, we're good at this.
Click through "read more" for the fantastic voyage.
I can't claim to have anything major to say these days. I'm not inclined to get too worked up about the endless conversations about what blogging means and what it means in the Buffalo sports universe in particular. Shit, most of what I've written here in the past few months is far from relevant to the Buffalo sports scene, what with my general disdain for speculating about drafts and free agents and teams that are a few months away from playing games that count. By the time the Sabres season comes around, I'll have a baby boy to dote on and, I imagine, far less time to dwell on these bizarre loves of mine. So, needless to say, I'm having my fun now.
And that fun, right now, is New York Mets baseball.
Last night, the DGWU Sports crew hit Citi Field for game two in this series against the Orioles. Game one, if you happened to be under a rock yesterday, was RA Dickey's second straight one-hitter. The former Buffalo Bison is pitching as good as anybody in the league right now, and better than the team's "ace," Johan Santana. As for Johan, he followed suit with a gem of his own last night, leading the Mets to their second straight shutout against Baltimore. Santana was in complete control through his six innings last night, and it was good to see following two less-than-inspiring outings which, in turn, followed his epic no hitter on June 1st.
The Deeg had an absurdly fun time last night as we were thoroughly over-served and unsurprisingly giddy to have a chance to hang out again. Yachtsman stepped on a homeless guy on the subway, Scizz threatened the same guy with a round of old-timey boxing, and Apologist got over the loss of his Orioles by watching Lebron "Pool Boy" James pull off some heroics of his own. And me? I pretended to not know any of those clowns while barely containing my laughter.
We're really good at this.
Needless to say, live-blogging tonight seems to be an appropriate follow-up to those shenanigans since I'm probably still drunk and since these live blogs usually end up being an excuse for me to find infantile pictures on the internet and giggle like a moron.
Again, we're good at this.
Click through "read more" for the fantastic voyage.
Fantastic Voyage you say? Don't mind if I do...
7:12 -- Dillon Gee on the mound, working past a full count for he first strikeout of the night. Swinging. I don't like to jinx shit, for fear of retribution, but I gotta think that Dickey and Johan's starts this week have motivated the rest of the staff.
7:13 -- 2 outs on the pop fly.
7:14 -- Keith and... Kevin Burkhardt are calling the game?? Is that correct? Oh god. Kevin Burkhardt is... well... not great. I'm being kind here. For Sabres fans out there, he's slightly better than Kevin Sylvester, but not by much. Hoping for quick at bats tonight so KB doesn't have to fill too much dead air.
7:17 -- Torres with a leadoff single to right. His return to the line-up was overdue, though I can't say that the outfield has struggled all that much with him out.
7:19 - Torres out at second on the fielders choice. D. Wright up next.
7:20 - Matt Wieters throws out Valdespin on a steal attempt. Got him by a fucking mile. Apparently Wieters has a gold glove or some shit. Whatever. You're an Oriole. You must hate your life.
7:22 - Wright works through it to get a single. I love him long time.
7:25 - HAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!! Hairston flies out to left center, and O's center fielder Adam Jones makes the team's 59th error of the year. They lead the American League in that particular statistic.
7:27 - It matters not, as Rottino grounds out.
7:30 - I kid a lot about the Orioles, though the reality is that the team is not all that different from the Mets, at least insofar as both teams should not be in their respective division hunts and have fan bases waiting, scared of their own shadow, expecting the other shoe to drop. Bad clichés are made for historically bad baseball teams in historically tough as nails divisions.
7:33 - Gee is pitching the tits. Third strikeout to retire the side. 22 pitches, 15 of them strikes. The quality of this staff is infectious. Like the clap, but less itchy.
7:13 -- 2 outs on the pop fly.
7:14 -- Keith and... Kevin Burkhardt are calling the game?? Is that correct? Oh god. Kevin Burkhardt is... well... not great. I'm being kind here. For Sabres fans out there, he's slightly better than Kevin Sylvester, but not by much. Hoping for quick at bats tonight so KB doesn't have to fill too much dead air.
7:17 -- Torres with a leadoff single to right. His return to the line-up was overdue, though I can't say that the outfield has struggled all that much with him out.
7:19 - Torres out at second on the fielders choice. D. Wright up next.
7:20 - Matt Wieters throws out Valdespin on a steal attempt. Got him by a fucking mile. Apparently Wieters has a gold glove or some shit. Whatever. You're an Oriole. You must hate your life.
7:22 - Wright works through it to get a single. I love him long time.
7:25 - HAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!! Hairston flies out to left center, and O's center fielder Adam Jones makes the team's 59th error of the year. They lead the American League in that particular statistic.
7:27 - It matters not, as Rottino grounds out.
7:30 - I kid a lot about the Orioles, though the reality is that the team is not all that different from the Mets, at least insofar as both teams should not be in their respective division hunts and have fan bases waiting, scared of their own shadow, expecting the other shoe to drop. Bad clichés are made for historically bad baseball teams in historically tough as nails divisions.
7:33 - Gee is pitching the tits. Third strikeout to retire the side. 22 pitches, 15 of them strikes. The quality of this staff is infectious. Like the clap, but less itchy.
7:38 -- two outs in the bottom half of the second. Ike flying out to center, and Justin Turner strikes out on three pitches. Really tough lineup out there tonight. Hard to see where the hits are going to come from, even with Valdespin and Wright out there.
7:45 -- Gee has his fourth K of the night. Ummmmm.....
7:45 -- they just showed the highlight of Duda's HR from last night. If you jack the sound up, I think you can hear me squealing in the outfield.
7:46 -- first hit of the night on D. Gee, and it goes to O's pitcher Brian Matusz. Mets are still sitting at TWENTY FOUR CONSECUTIVE SCORELESS INNINGS. I used caps to make sure y'all are aware of the sports boner I have for this team.
7:48 - Gee walks the next batter. Zoinks.
7:49 - JJ Hardy is up. He's nasty. Gee looks scurrrrrred.
7:50 - No matter, as Gee gets out of the jam. Hardy lines out to Justin Turner. Justin Turner, for those who don't know, has taken the reigns as the Mets social media darling despite having no discernible talent. Follow him at @redturn2.
7:53 -- Gee leads off the bottom of the third and actually almost makes it on. The Orioles look a little mistake prone tonight. Maybe it's the heat, maybe it's the fact that they're the Orioles.
7:55 - I am prophetic. Wilson Betemit with a throwing error, allowing Torres to advance to second. If nothing else, our third baseman is better than their third baseman. No contest.
7:45 -- Gee has his fourth K of the night. Ummmmm.....
7:45 -- they just showed the highlight of Duda's HR from last night. If you jack the sound up, I think you can hear me squealing in the outfield.
7:46 -- first hit of the night on D. Gee, and it goes to O's pitcher Brian Matusz. Mets are still sitting at TWENTY FOUR CONSECUTIVE SCORELESS INNINGS. I used caps to make sure y'all are aware of the sports boner I have for this team.
7:48 - Gee walks the next batter. Zoinks.
7:49 - JJ Hardy is up. He's nasty. Gee looks scurrrrrred.
7:50 - No matter, as Gee gets out of the jam. Hardy lines out to Justin Turner. Justin Turner, for those who don't know, has taken the reigns as the Mets social media darling despite having no discernible talent. Follow him at @redturn2.
7:53 -- Gee leads off the bottom of the third and actually almost makes it on. The Orioles look a little mistake prone tonight. Maybe it's the heat, maybe it's the fact that they're the Orioles.
7:55 - I am prophetic. Wilson Betemit with a throwing error, allowing Torres to advance to second. If nothing else, our third baseman is better than their third baseman. No contest.
There is no context for this, but motherfucking ninjas will get you every time.
8:02 -- Mets' third inning fizzled. Top of 4th, and Gee gets his fifth K of the night. This is getting silly. I need a new beer.
8:03 -- Strikeout number six, followed by groundout to Davis at first. Still scoreless, putting the scoreless inning streak at 25. Bananas.
8:09 - Scott Hairston jacks a cutter to left for a double. His tenth double of the year, so says KB.
8:10 - Rottino moves Hairston over with a ground out. Perfect set up for some small ball with a sac fly here. Especially with Ike up to bat.
8:11 - And Davis strikes out. Remember when fans were declaring that he had busted his slump? About that.... /slams head on coffee table
8:13 - I really hope Terry Collins is planning on putting a couple of the big bats in for the later innings tonight. These guys are dreadful.
8:16 - Turner gets on with a walk. Runners at the corners, but Mike Nickeas is coming up. #NickeasSuckeas
8:17 -- Nickeas lines to center, and Jones can't handle it as he dives for the catch. 1-0 Mets!
8:03 -- Strikeout number six, followed by groundout to Davis at first. Still scoreless, putting the scoreless inning streak at 25. Bananas.
8:09 - Scott Hairston jacks a cutter to left for a double. His tenth double of the year, so says KB.
8:10 - Rottino moves Hairston over with a ground out. Perfect set up for some small ball with a sac fly here. Especially with Ike up to bat.
8:11 - And Davis strikes out. Remember when fans were declaring that he had busted his slump? About that.... /slams head on coffee table
8:13 - I really hope Terry Collins is planning on putting a couple of the big bats in for the later innings tonight. These guys are dreadful.
8:16 - Turner gets on with a walk. Runners at the corners, but Mike Nickeas is coming up. #NickeasSuckeas
8:17 -- Nickeas lines to center, and Jones can't handle it as he dives for the catch. 1-0 Mets!
8:27 -- Mrs. Barrister (or the "Baronness" if you ask Joe Pinzone) asks if I'm recording game. I say no, she asks what's recording on DVR. We discover that a Justin Bieber special has decided to record itself, inexplicably. Apparently the Bieber has resorted to hacking for his burgeoning fan base. I want him dead.
8:29 - Valdespin gets the benefit of a bad, albeit close, call. One on, one out, bottom of the fifth.
8:30 - Needless to say, I didn't pay attention to the top of the fifth because I was making Abe Lincoln jokes.
8:31 - Wright with a bloop single to shallow left. Or deep short. The Orioles appear to have no desire to run in this heat. Someone should tell them that they won't get any favors this weekend, as it's all but guaranteed that the Yankees increase their AL East division lead by sweeping the Mets. Again.
8:34 - Hairston rocks one to left. It bounces off the wall above the orange strip, giving him a ground rule double and an RBI.
8:37 - Rottino is walked to force a possible double play ball. Davis almost gives it to them, but Rottino has a good slide and breaks up the throw to first. Great play, as it allows Wright to score from third. 3-0 Mets.
PITCHING CHANGE!!!! Hit the music!
8:29 - Valdespin gets the benefit of a bad, albeit close, call. One on, one out, bottom of the fifth.
8:30 - Needless to say, I didn't pay attention to the top of the fifth because I was making Abe Lincoln jokes.
8:31 - Wright with a bloop single to shallow left. Or deep short. The Orioles appear to have no desire to run in this heat. Someone should tell them that they won't get any favors this weekend, as it's all but guaranteed that the Yankees increase their AL East division lead by sweeping the Mets. Again.
8:34 - Hairston rocks one to left. It bounces off the wall above the orange strip, giving him a ground rule double and an RBI.
8:37 - Rottino is walked to force a possible double play ball. Davis almost gives it to them, but Rottino has a good slide and breaks up the throw to first. Great play, as it allows Wright to score from third. 3-0 Mets.
PITCHING CHANGE!!!! Hit the music!
I'm the best.
8:43 - Over/under on readers of this post is 15 1/2. I'm taking the under.
8:45 - In case anyone is wondering, I'm drinking a delicious Stone Double Bastard Ale tonight. It's making this extra special for everyone because alcohol is magic.
8:46 - Gee now has eight strikeouts. And they popped over to a clip of BoSox v Marlins, where the Sox are leading 12-4. Lulz.
8:48 - J.J. Hardy looks like he likes feet. REALLY liked them.
8:49 - He's also out to end the inning.
8:43 - Over/under on readers of this post is 15 1/2. I'm taking the under.
8:45 - In case anyone is wondering, I'm drinking a delicious Stone Double Bastard Ale tonight. It's making this extra special for everyone because alcohol is magic.
8:46 - Gee now has eight strikeouts. And they popped over to a clip of BoSox v Marlins, where the Sox are leading 12-4. Lulz.
8:48 - J.J. Hardy looks like he likes feet. REALLY liked them.
8:49 - He's also out to end the inning.
8:53 - GEE!!!!! With the double to DEEP center. Holy christ.
8:55 - Apparently, when I wondered about where the hits would come from tonight, I neglected to assume that the Orioles would play themselves out of the game. Wild pitch moves Gee over the third.
8:57 - Valdespin hits a pop to short, and gets grilled by Keith for not running it out. Not sure how the infield fly rule was not called, though.
8:59 - D. WRIGHT!!! RBI double to left center, Gee scores. Another ground rule double as we begin to see the downside of that shorter fence in left. Not that I'm complaining. 4-0 Mets. DRINK.
9:01- Hairston is up and the O's have to be thinking this is do or die time. He's been a fucking monster today, and another RBI would basically be ballgame.
9:02 - It got crazy dark in my apartment. I may need someone to come and hold me. My aforementioned missus wants nothing to do with me tonight. Clearly.
9:04 - Cracked another beer. Moved on to Coors Light. Hairston is out to end the inning, so there's still plenty of game left.
9:05 - Looks like Kirk Nieuwenhuis is in the game now, with righty Luis Ayala on the mound. Kirk subbed in for Vinny Rottino, who's had a nice outing.
9:07 - Top of the 7th. Gee on pitch 79 with the pop out to foul territory by third base. He's working on a one-hitter, having retired 11 in a row. 28 consecutive scoreless.
9:09 - Make that 12 in a row. And now 13. This rules the school.
8:55 - Apparently, when I wondered about where the hits would come from tonight, I neglected to assume that the Orioles would play themselves out of the game. Wild pitch moves Gee over the third.
8:57 - Valdespin hits a pop to short, and gets grilled by Keith for not running it out. Not sure how the infield fly rule was not called, though.
8:59 - D. WRIGHT!!! RBI double to left center, Gee scores. Another ground rule double as we begin to see the downside of that shorter fence in left. Not that I'm complaining. 4-0 Mets. DRINK.
9:01- Hairston is up and the O's have to be thinking this is do or die time. He's been a fucking monster today, and another RBI would basically be ballgame.
9:02 - It got crazy dark in my apartment. I may need someone to come and hold me. My aforementioned missus wants nothing to do with me tonight. Clearly.
9:04 - Cracked another beer. Moved on to Coors Light. Hairston is out to end the inning, so there's still plenty of game left.
9:05 - Looks like Kirk Nieuwenhuis is in the game now, with righty Luis Ayala on the mound. Kirk subbed in for Vinny Rottino, who's had a nice outing.
9:07 - Top of the 7th. Gee on pitch 79 with the pop out to foul territory by third base. He's working on a one-hitter, having retired 11 in a row. 28 consecutive scoreless.
9:09 - Make that 12 in a row. And now 13. This rules the school.
Someday, remind me to explain why this list is full of shit.
9:19 - I'm coasting on this one at this point. I need dinner on top of those three beers, and I'm finding myself more interested in pitching than offense. This is how weird the Mets have made me lately. A few years back, I'd DVR games so I could fast forward through defensive halves of innings. I hate myself for that now.
9:21 - Quintanilla has entered the game at shortstop. Turner put in some decent work today, but it's time to lock this shit down. KB notes that, should the one hitter hold up, it would be the 4th one-hitter (or less) in the last 19 games.
9:22 - And Burkhardt jinxes it like a little bitch. Infield base hit for Nick Johnson.
9:23 - BREAKING: Burkhardt did not jinx, in fact. Single was hit due to Scizz putting on the game for the first time of the night. Don't fret, Mets fans! He's gone back to watching American Pickers. The world is safe.
9:26 - FUCK SCIZZ IN HIS ASS. Betemit with a shot to right and the O's have their first runs of the series. This is why we can't have nice things, El Scizzero.
4-2 Mets.
9:28 - The stretch ends at 29 scoreless innings. Gee's pitch count is approaching a hundo, so you gotta figure he won't make it to the 9th.
9:29 - Yup. Walks him with his 99th pitch of the night. Bobby Parnell coming in for some relief work. Perfect time to make a late fat kid dinner.
9:21 - Quintanilla has entered the game at shortstop. Turner put in some decent work today, but it's time to lock this shit down. KB notes that, should the one hitter hold up, it would be the 4th one-hitter (or less) in the last 19 games.
9:22 - And Burkhardt jinxes it like a little bitch. Infield base hit for Nick Johnson.
9:23 - BREAKING: Burkhardt did not jinx, in fact. Single was hit due to Scizz putting on the game for the first time of the night. Don't fret, Mets fans! He's gone back to watching American Pickers. The world is safe.
9:26 - FUCK SCIZZ IN HIS ASS. Betemit with a shot to right and the O's have their first runs of the series. This is why we can't have nice things, El Scizzero.
4-2 Mets.
9:28 - The stretch ends at 29 scoreless innings. Gee's pitch count is approaching a hundo, so you gotta figure he won't make it to the 9th.
9:29 - Yup. Walks him with his 99th pitch of the night. Bobby Parnell coming in for some relief work. Perfect time to make a late fat kid dinner.
America.
9:35 - Looks like Parnell is eating a bag of dick tonight. As good as the starters have been over the past few weeks, the bullpen has lost the swagger they had early in the season. Parnell being a prime example. Two men on, with the go ahead run at the plate with only one out.
9:36 - God loves us. Weird call as Hardy is called out after he hits an apparent dribbler and then hits it again with his follow-through. I don't know baseball rules, but I think this might have something to do with all the African-American patients who were subjected to medical research without informed consent at Johns Hopkins in the early 20th century. I'm pretty sure I'm right about this one.
9:40 - Parnell ceases his knob chomping and gets out of the inning. Hooray him. Still 4-2 Mets.
9:43 - O's third baseman Betemit with a web gem put out of Nickeas. #NickeasSuckeas
9:44 - DANIEL MURPHY HAS A MUSTACHE. Holyyyyy Shit. When you're in a slump, what do you do? Grow some fucking pubes on your face. That's the ticket.
9:36 - God loves us. Weird call as Hardy is called out after he hits an apparent dribbler and then hits it again with his follow-through. I don't know baseball rules, but I think this might have something to do with all the African-American patients who were subjected to medical research without informed consent at Johns Hopkins in the early 20th century. I'm pretty sure I'm right about this one.
9:40 - Parnell ceases his knob chomping and gets out of the inning. Hooray him. Still 4-2 Mets.
9:43 - O's third baseman Betemit with a web gem put out of Nickeas. #NickeasSuckeas
9:44 - DANIEL MURPHY HAS A MUSTACHE. Holyyyyy Shit. When you're in a slump, what do you do? Grow some fucking pubes on your face. That's the ticket.
Douche. Face. Douche. Face.
9:51 - One out in the top of the 9th for Francisco. He hasn't had a lot of work to do of late, so I'm hoping he can step into the role and do his job.
9:52 - Wieters with a base hit, and the tying run gets on. I don't love this. I do love tacos. Hey, speaking of Tacos.... Download Episode 31 of the CrapTastiCast - "TacoMania." It's the right thing to do, children. (Note: CrapTastiCast not intended for children. Just like Mike Harrington!).
9:53 - Oh noes. Two men on.
9:56 - Let it be known that I actually do enjoy an occasional mustache. Not for rides, mind you, but I'm just saying. Though, when the mustache is on a guy who's scratching to stay up with the Big Club as Jordanny Valdespin looks to establish himself as a more viable candidate at second base, I poke fun. So, to repeat: nice landing strip, Murph. It compliments your vagina quite well.
9:52 - Wieters with a base hit, and the tying run gets on. I don't love this. I do love tacos. Hey, speaking of Tacos.... Download Episode 31 of the CrapTastiCast - "TacoMania." It's the right thing to do, children. (Note: CrapTastiCast not intended for children. Just like Mike Harrington!).
9:53 - Oh noes. Two men on.
9:56 - Let it be known that I actually do enjoy an occasional mustache. Not for rides, mind you, but I'm just saying. Though, when the mustache is on a guy who's scratching to stay up with the Big Club as Jordanny Valdespin looks to establish himself as a more viable candidate at second base, I poke fun. So, to repeat: nice landing strip, Murph. It compliments your vagina quite well.
Murphy's nickname also happens to be "Finger Cuffs"
10:06 - 4-3 Mets. Francisco has been a hot fucking mess, loading the bases and walking a runner home. If I didn't make myself pee my pants with laughter so consistently, I'd be livid now. Meh.
10:07 - Woohoo!!!!! Fuck yo couch, Baltimore!
The Mets pull off the sweep, leaving them with a fourth straight series which ended in a sweep. 0-3 to Yankees, 3-0 to Rays, 0-3 to Reds, 3-0 to O's. This is weird.
With the Nats' win tonight against Tampa and the Braves win against the Yankees, the Mets keep pace and keep themselves in 2nd place only 3 games back of Washington. With the continuing heat tomorrow, it's the perfect time for a day off before another big series against the Yanks. I talked a lot of shit before the last series, and look where that got me. Needless to say, I'm not optimistic against a Yankees team 8-2 in their last ten (even if they are coming off two straight Ls against the Braves). In any event, I'll be out of town for the series this weekend, so I'm just hoping they can stay afloat and in position as we lead up to some very exciting ball in July.
Thanks for bearing with me, if you've made it this far. I'm more than a little drunk and have some dinner to finally get to.
Cheers.
10:07 - Woohoo!!!!! Fuck yo couch, Baltimore!
The Mets pull off the sweep, leaving them with a fourth straight series which ended in a sweep. 0-3 to Yankees, 3-0 to Rays, 0-3 to Reds, 3-0 to O's. This is weird.
With the Nats' win tonight against Tampa and the Braves win against the Yankees, the Mets keep pace and keep themselves in 2nd place only 3 games back of Washington. With the continuing heat tomorrow, it's the perfect time for a day off before another big series against the Yanks. I talked a lot of shit before the last series, and look where that got me. Needless to say, I'm not optimistic against a Yankees team 8-2 in their last ten (even if they are coming off two straight Ls against the Braves). In any event, I'll be out of town for the series this weekend, so I'm just hoping they can stay afloat and in position as we lead up to some very exciting ball in July.
Thanks for bearing with me, if you've made it this far. I'm more than a little drunk and have some dinner to finally get to.
Cheers.
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