Having so thoroughly enjoyed Scizz's previous foray into liveblogging a Cubs game - despite the rain delay involved - I'm going to take advantage of Mrs. Barrister's book club night, along with a pretty early end of the work day for me, to have some fun tonight. After all - propensity to jinx my teams be damned - the METS COULD BE AT .500 WHEN TONIGHT IS OVER. As I've chronicled pretty thoroughly at DGWU Sports, the Mets season has been a series of hopeful and frustrating moments. Actually, you really need to take it back to last season for the full context: K-Rod punching his baby-mama's daddy and busting his hand in the process, Johan needing surgery on his shoulder, and the Wilpon's parade of financial misdealings, all of which have had a negative impact coming into this season. Bullpen guys have been forced to start and AAA guys (Go Bisons!) have been called up along the way, due to further injuries, all of which has left most fans feeling less than confident in the team's ability to stay competitive each game, much less make a run at a divisional crown. And then there's Ike and D Wright going down within a week of each other. Other than the Greece/Ecuador match at Citi Field last week, Flushing has been a dismal and empty place.
Yet, here we are, looking at a Mets team just below .500 and only 7.5 games out of first in the East. As a fan of all things Buffalo, I'd like to credit Buffalo Baseball Hall of Famer Terry Collins for making a lot out of a little, but I think a lot of it has to do with guys actually playing up to their abilities, rather than down to the low expectations of us fans (read: disgruntled Yankee-loving NYC media). Injuries have crippled this team, sure, but hell if the guys left on the field aren't actually kind of decent. Who knows? If they can stay afloat into July, get Wright, Johan and Davis back...this team could make some noise down the August and September stretch. Or they could just get themselves into 2nd in the East, only to lose ten straight to close out the season. Whatever. I'll take a build up to a let down over no build up at all.
Anyway, this post will chronicle my evening of Mets watching. I'll likely be checking in on the Stanley Cup Finals as well, so don't be surprised if you see comments about that game as well. And, of course, with a computer on my lap, other semi-tangentially related content may make it in also. Who knows? Anything can happen. WE'RE DOING IT LIVE!!
6:35: Reyes is batting .346 this year, by the way. Leads the NL in that category, as well as triples (though the latter stat is nothing new). But with a lifetime average of .290, his ability at the plate is ABSURD this year. Unsurprisingly, he also leads the NL in hits, as well as singles.
6:40: "Karate? The Dane Cook of martial arts? No." - Archer. That reminds me. Dane Cook sucks.
6:50: Drink of the night is Tangueray and Tonic. With lime, obviously. Might be the death of me. SNY not yet on, as Archer is way better than NYC sports media.
6:56: In response to group text suggestion of opening up tonight's post to witty and/or relevant texts from the rest of the DGWU Crew, Yachter comes up with this gem: "The fat penis man on the Mets pregame has the most punchable face I've seen in New York." Which begs the question: Which one does the Yachtsman mean?
7:02: Mets lineup is as follows: Reyes, Turner, Beltran, Pagan, Bay, Paulino, Murphy, Tejada, Pelfrey. Paul Maholm is starting on the mound for the Bucs.
7:04: Reyes shown doing his ridiculous handshakes with teammates. I love him. If/When they trade Jose, I'll be a sad kid. He leads off with a groundout to short.
7:12: After Justin "Ginger" Turner makes it to first on a BB, Beltran grounds into a double play. Required a great stop from Brandon Wood, the Pirates third baseman. Top of the 1st is in the bag. I will comment much less about Mets defense. You can bank on that.
7:17: Pirates take lead on a series of singles. Zero outs. Pelfrey in trouble early. Nothing new here.
7:18: Big Pelf helps himself by picking the runner at 2nd off with a great move. Next batter flies out to right center, a play that would have pushed runner to third. Instead, Pirates have two outs with a guy on first. Gary: "Those are the things that lose you ballgames." Gary should know with all the Mets baseball he watches.
7:22 Overbay strikes out. END OF 1st.
Mets 0, Pirates 1
7:25: Angel Pagan leading off 2nd. Apparently batting .349 since returning from injury. Also sporting a badass beard. Good thinking! (HOW DOES GOOGLE IMAGES NOT HAVE THIS DOCUMENTED?) Pagan grounds out.
7:28: Jason Bay, arguably the most frustrating Met of the year, fights to a 3-2 count, and gets his base on balls.
7:31: Murphy with Mets' first hit of night. Off of a 0-2 count. I like the aggressiveness from Murph. Moves Bay to third. Mets have two outs due to out that I missed. Entirely possible Bay is actually out, and the guy to third is someone else.
7:34: Tejada flies out to center. Three outs, two left on.
Already bored of the game, I figured I'd share some great music from a great friend of mine, Ryan O'Neil. One of the craziest videos I've ever seen. MUPPETS!
END OF 2nd
7:40: Pelf leads off. What an ugly hitter. Strikes out. Is batting less than .100 in his career.
7:42: Reyes robbed with great sliding catch in shallow right by Garrett Jones.
7:44: Mets stats from Gary. In this series, first time through inning, Mets are .087. Second time through .385, .third time through .478.
7:45: With Turner groundout, Mets have some hits to get to keep that average up. Bottom of third.
7:55: Pelf cruised through bottm of third. Mets blow through first two batters. Kevin Burkhardt is in booth now, talking about Santana recovery. "He's not even close." Ugh. Will try off of mound again soon. Looks like August 1 may be projected return date now. Johan not yet at the "beginning of spring training" level. Keith opines that he's too valuable to push. Meanwhile, Bay strikes out. Way to go, Jason. Douche.
7:59: Pelf continues his good play. Has retired 11 straight since first inning issues.
END OF 4th.
Hey, Mets' bats...Anytime you want to help Mike out, that would be great.
Still Mets 0, Pirates 1.
8:03: The Pirates have been around for 125 years? Damn. If I were meaner, I'd make jokes about Yachtsman's mom being their original team marm, but...it would be cruel. And I'm not entirely sure "marm" is the word I'm looking for. It means prostitute, right?
8:08: Murphy now has two hits, but is followed by Tejada. Guys at 1st and 2nd with one out.
8:09-8:12: Pelf up to bat, which all but guarantees that the Mets won't get a double play now. Oh WTF - why is he swinging? No guarantees in Mets baseball. Pelf then bunts through pitch, Murphy caught in a rundown. Tejada makes it to second on decent baserunning while Murph runs around like an asshole. Pelfrey follows with decent cuts, including near hit down the third baseline, and makes Pirates pitcher (already forgotten his name, don't care enough to find out) work. Pelf ultimately grounds out. Updside: Reyes to lead off 6th.
And, still a little bored: More promotion for my boy Ryan O'Neil. And as I type this, Wood crunks a homer to left. 12 homeruns given up by Pelf this year. Mets 0, Pirates 2. But, still, take a listen to the video below, which isn't actually a video.
8:20: Mets make it out of inning with limited damage. Again, I repeat. GET SOME HITS. Ugh. This gin is not helping. That's a lie.
END OF 5th.
8:24: Jose pops out for the 1st out. I may move to scotch soon.
8:25: Ginger Turner inexplicably bunts - badly - and gets to first on an error by the pitcher. Beltran follows with pop out to right. Two outs.
8:26: Angel Pagan, the walking religious contradiction, grounds out to second. Middle of the 6th. Mets 0, Pirates 2.
8:34: Pelfrey cruises through bottom of 6th. Has matched his season high in strikeouts.
END OF 6th.
8:38: Mets go 1-2-3 on SEVEN PITCHES. Wow. Good fucking lord. This team is vehemently against my attempts at fan participation/hyping of their sports-product. Fine. I get your point. Except that I might not remember this tomorrow.
8:45: Have put the booze aside in favor of a Firecracker Popcicle, aka The Bomb Pop. Good thing my one-handed typing skills are in good practice. Pelfrey still looking for the win.
END OF 7th.
8:46: More grexting gold from The Yachstman... On Keith's comment about staying in Pitt tonight whuile rest of SNY crew flies down to ATL for the mid-week series: "With Keith staying in Shittsburgh one more day, how much old single lady piano bar ass is he gonna get? I say over under a thousand with me picking the over. I do so with full faith in his spectacular stache."
8:50: Tejada leads off, gets ahead 3-1 against the Pirates reliever. Works his way onto first with a walk.
8:52: More from Yachter, as he wonders whether Bernie Madoff was Jason Bay's representative when he signed. A fair query, though I'd wonder more about Jose Castillo's or Oliver Perez's deals. Regardless, since they were all paid for by Bernie funds, however indirectly, there's a case to be made for each of them. I say Wilpon hits up Jose and Ollie for some cash before he pays back the Madoff defraudees.
8:57: Reyes robbed again with men at 1st and 3rd. Tejada gets home on sacrifice, though it was debatable whether he actually left too soon. Duda doubled up as he runs to second in anticipation of ball dropping in short left. METS SCORED THOUGH! Boom. Mets 1, Pirates 2. Turner proceeds to fly out. Going to bottom of 8th.
Time for another video!
9:06: With Manny Acosta in, Pirates get two singles to get men on first and third. Acosta has not played since his most recent call-up. Gotta be a short leash with Terry. He could probably find one in Keith's box o' kink.
9:09: Despite good effort by Ginger Turner, his throw is up the line and probably late. Infield single loads up the bases. Acosta pulled for Byrdak. One out.
9:11: Ad with guy doing solo flash mob in Grand Central comes on. Douche. Of all the group activities to get in on, a flash mob is NOT on my list. This, however, I could get into:
9:16: 3 and 2, 2 outs, bases loaded in bottom of 8th. Let's Go Mets chants rain down from stands. The Pirates have not been good for a MINUTE. Nicest ballpark in the east, so I've heard, in a sports town. They deserve better. And apparently the Mets agree! Byrdak walks batter, runner comes in. Byrdak pulled. Mets 1, Pirates 3.
9:21: Mets get out of inning with just the one run against.
END OF THE 8th.
9:25: Beltran grounds out sharply to second. Pagan strikes out. JASON BAY IS UP. FIRST PITCH BOMB!! To the fucking warning track.
Kill yourself Jason Bay. You'd be the worst "Bay" in the world if it weren't for Michael Bay and Guantanamo Bay. But you're in 3rd. If anyone's curious, the Bay of Pigs and Baywatch round out the top 5.
And no, I'm not so drunk that I think that was funny. But I am drunk enough to just leave it up there, annoying us all. Just like Jason Bay, the reigning Turd Ferguson.
Well, folks, I'd do a brief recap if I thought there was anything really to say. Another split against the Pirates, another wasted opportunity. Mets shift to two games below .500. As predicted. I'm sorry, it was obviously my fault for even doing this.
But, I had fun, and I hope you did as well. Thanks to the DGWU Crew for keeping me company, and to BC for hopping in as well. Looks like there may be an impromptu trip to Citi this weekend, so look for more Mets coverage then.
To play us out, some Camp Lo. This joint was in heavy rotation after it's presence on a mix CD (remember those) from fellow Buffalo expat in NYC, The Wookie (a nickname I made up just now...or maybe I didn't...dude's pretty hairy, I'm sure it's been said).
Follow me on Twitter @theycallmedubs
And the DGWU Crew @DGWUSports @TheScizz @Y_vo @Sam_Hartman