High Character Fridays! Pt. 2

05/15/2009

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Welcome to DGWUS' 2nd edition of High Character Fridays!

This week, DGWUS blogger the Scizz brings the motha 'uckin ruckus.  I hope you enjoy, because after posting this, he will retreat to a dark corner of the library for the rest of the weekend in order to finish several papers for Grad school.  Fuck.

So who will be the next Buffalo Bill arrested?  The choice is easy... the Stormin' Mormon, Ryan Denney.

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Surprised?  I bet you are.  The charges?  Polygamy.  

In the coming weeks, it will be revealed that Denney has a wife in every NFL city. Except in Boston. I mean, why would he want chlamydia?

He will be caught after 23 of his wives arrive to surprise him at OTA's at the same time.  Every one of them will be wearing his jersey, which will raise suspicion, especially since the only other person to ever buy it is this guy:
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It will soon be revealed that the incident was a trap, set by fellow D-lineman, and general loser Chris Kelsay. Kelsay was totally jealous that Denney was tappin' so much ass that he made Bill Henrickson look like a novice.  However, it will backfire for Chris, as all charges will be dropped, and Goodell will not fine or suspend him a single game. After he realizes Denney is white. 

DGWUS Super Special Fun Fact:  Fellow Buffalo Bill, OL Kirk Chambers is also Mormon!  And he sucks!
 


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